julieannegreenbank

When Your Daughter Marries…

The days and weeks leading up to my daughter’s wedding on December 31st were filled with planning, to do lists and checklists, and lots and lots of excitement. And then…just like that it was over. The wedding went perfectly (mostly…after several beautiful sunny days in a row we had a monsoon on that day!!) and all of that planning and work came together to give her the wedding she had hoped and dreamed of and off they went into their new adventure together. And I was so happy for her and for them and for us (we’ve gained a wonderful son-in-law)!!

But then…I was inexplicably sad. I couldn’t understand it and I probably still don’t, truth be told. Suddenly, even though she hasn’t lived at home for three years, I missed her so much and part of me wanted my blonde, curly haired, feisty, brave girl back in my fold and back in her room…slamming doors, letting the muddy dog in, traipsing through the house with her friends eating all the food, leaving a trail of stuff wherever she goes, dancing with me in the kitchen, and singing…always singing!! Playing her guitar or her ukulele, or my favorite, our piano with her original musical compositions whose lyrics have often brought me to tears because they are so profoundly moving.

No one told me this would happen and while I think it is probably extremely normal, I was unprepared for the unexpected grief that I felt. Not grief because she got married…they are blissfully happy and are so meant to be together and we are overjoyed for them…but rather, I think, grief because this normal life transition brings with it a certain finality…she is not my little girl anymore. So, I confess I have spent some of these cold winter days curled up in an old quilt in front of my fireplace and just…sweetly remembering.

I’m grateful for making sure that our planning allowed for some special time together before and during the ceremony: Time that I will forever remember.

We did a spa day, just her and I, three days before the wedding which included a massage, a facial, and then lunch and then mani’s and pedi’s. It was so fun to finalize plans.
We were able to have rehearsal dinner early so that all the extended family could have some downtime to just visit. And she popped in for some of that.
She could get ready at home so the pictures of her preparing are taking place in the privacy and intimacy of my room.
The first song of the evening was mine and Courtney’s song and the DJ played it right after other special dances so I was able to dance with her and I wanted just to see if she was truly and completely enjoying her wedding and she was!! It was fun to listen to her talk about her favorite things!!
The day after the wedding, they came and opened gifts at home with us… so fun to see the lovely things they received.

Well, I’m starting to feel better now….The sadness comes and goes but at least I’m up and engaging with people now and I certainly feel way more joy than sadness. Every time that I’m able to see her, I’m so excited but I’m trying to respect newly-wed boundaries (whatever those are??)!!!

So, I’m sure that this transition of grieving will even out and I will stop crying every time I think of her!! We are possibly getting an ice storm tonight so I don’t know what tomorrow will bring here but stay warm my friends and imprint your memories deep into your heart because the transitions will come when you are not ready!!

I hope soon to write about what I learned as mother-of-the-bride and share those tips with you! Hope you can make it to church some where.

Here is a photo of Courtney singing her vows to Jacob. 💕💕💕

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Thank you for joining me. I would like to invite you to follow my blog…

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Feel free to follow as indicated. Have a lovely rest of your weekend!

Julie

The Broken Dish

It is hard for me to believe that a whole year has gone by since I last wrote here!! I truly did have such good intentions with my blog but I guess the time got away from me. I will say that it has been one of the most difficult years of my life…it was filled with a lot of change and some disappointments as well as some devastating loss. It ended on the most loveliest of notes though with my daughter’s wedding on New Years Eve!!

And so 2019 has begun with the promise and hope of love and happily ever after!! The wedding went beautifully…it is so fun to watch them get settled in as newlyweds… and now after the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season and wedding planning, I am adjusting to the quiet of winter. I actually don’t mind the winter months (as long as I can have a fire and my cuddle duds so I can keep warm!) and I enjoy the opportunity for quiet reflection and looking ahead to the more productive seasons of the year. Like so many people I usually set some goals for the coming year and even adopt a “word” of the year. This year though, God taught me a really good lesson about resolutions and goals… For our Christmas dinner, I pulled out my favorite serving dishes as I always do and served my family our traditional dishes and recipes. After dinner I cleaned up, put away, and washed dishes. If you know me, you know that I collect ironstone dish ware and to protect these treasures, I hand wash each piece. So, this year at the end of the day, my husband John was putting away the dishes for me (as he often does… what a great guy!) and showed me that the handle of the favorite ironstone serving dish that I often use was now broken. I was so sad and angry with myself for being careless. Initially, I thought what am I going to do with this broken dish? But, as I looked at my favorite dish (which I had always thought was so beautiful), I realized that the dish was still beautiful and still usable even though it had a broken piece…And that is when God reminded me that just like that dish, I have broken parts of who I am but God still thinks that I am beautiful and God still wants to use me! I also realized that even if I glued the broken piece back on to the dish, there would always be a scar and no amount of super glue would ever remove the scar of that broken place. But that is okay, because even though our scars remind us of where we have come from, they don’t define where we are going. And that is when I realized that my goals and resolutions are like the super glue – they can’t remove my scars or change my past, they very simply help me be used by God… I decided right then and there that I would always keep and use my beautiful serving dish!

I hope each of you are having a great start to your new year and I look forward to hopefully conversing with you more in the weeks to come! Meanwhile…here are a couple of pictures of our bride and a picture of my puppy Scarlett who is now full grown!!

Happy Winter!!

First Things

My goodness!! I can’t believe we are already into the third week of the year! My husband and I got a new puppy for ourselves for Christmas so my days have been consumed with puppy training and all that goes with that!! And to top it all off, it has been very cold here since New Years and on Friday our region received some snow (about 6 inches at my home) and the bitter cold temperatures remained. So, I haven’t needed to exercise off my Christmas holiday treats because gearing up in all my snow gear and chasing a puppy in the snow has been my workout so far!! I haven’t minded any of it at all. I am from northern Indiana and grew up not seeing the actual ground for weeks. I love the snow and don’t mind the cold if I can bundle up properly!!

fullsizeoutput_5102 — Meet our new puppy Scarlett!! She loves running through the snow!!

January happens to be one of my favorite months which leads me to some thoughts I wanted to share. One of the things that I love about January is the idea of “firsts.” I have been thinking about the word “first” these last couple of weeks and pondering the promise of that word. In Webster’s Dictionary the word first means: coming before all, preceding all others in time, order, or importance. Think about all of the ways that we use this word: first prize, first in line, first anniversary, first girlfriend/boyfriend, first kiss, first day of kindergarten, first birthday, first in line, first born, first lady, first day of the year, first time the puppy scratches at the door to let you know she needs to go out!!

Many of the ways that we use this word is to signify a very special event of some sort and within that use is the promise of something good to come or to follow that first thing. But I have been thinking about the word “first” in regards to position or even priorities. The question I have been pondering is “What and who is first in my life?” As I am trying to bring post-holiday order to my life, (which is taking much longer than usual because of Miss Scarlett!!) I am considering this and asking myself “what are my first priorities?”

What we think about and what we do with our time tells the story of what matters most to us in our heart. So, I am considering my thoughts and my ways to determine what is first for me. Is it maintaining my home? Is it TV or social media? Is it my “me time” or hobbies? Or is it people? And even more importantly…is it God? Does my life reflect that God is first in my life? Does my life reflect that people matter more than possessions, to do lists, and entertainment? As I am going through my days here in this first month of the year, I want the most important things in my life to be the first things.

I hope you are having a lovely first month of the year and I’m wishing good and lovely things for you as you go through your days!!

See you next time!

Julie

My First Blog – Indiana Girl

This is the post excerpt.

It is said, If you want to take a step back in time, visit Indiana.

Hi! My name is Julie. I’ve wanted to try blogging for a long time and finally decided to start in this new year!! I was born and raised in Indiana and have lived here the majority of my life. I live in a country home on five acres in the southern part of the state. I am surrounded by corn fields, woods, and memories – and, my DNA includes cold winters, summers beside Lake Michigan, and a love for basketball (you can’t live in Indiana and not love the game)!

Indiana Postcard

I look forward to sharing my favorite stories, recipes, and memories of my Hoosier home. I hope I can make some new friends with this adventure!